[ Protect my city. That was the last thing Matt Murdock had whispered to him before they left him in that place of ruin to die. Try as he might, he couldn't erase the guilt that he felt. He knew it was much the same for Luke and Jessica. Time didn't seem to ease what he felt.
The first night, instead of giving in to meditation or grief, he'd taken to the streets. Most of the city seemed to know that it had lost something, but couldn't place exactly what. Any petty criminal foolish enough to be out and cross paths with Danny regretted the decision quickly. His temper got the better of him. Reckless and hot-headed as he usually is, it was amplified in his grief. Waking into the second day brought an acute awareness of loss to his senses, muddled and slowed his reflexes, and Colleen finally managed to coax him into a meditation session.
A brief amount of peace found him in the beginning of it. He tried to focus on the source of the turmoil in his mind. The pain of it, and to let it go. Something refused to budge, like a wall he couldn't push past. He felt cold like the bite of the weather outside of the apartment though he knew it was warm enough where he sat. The muffled sound of boats, and water. He could smell ash and taste blood.
He tried to dismiss the feelings. To push them out of his present focus, but they grew even stronger. It was a gasp in pain that suddenly had him jolting out of his meditation, and stumbling to his feet. He heard stories about the joining of consciousness, but he'd never actually done it before. If this was what he thought it was then---
Danny ran for the door, grabbing a jacket and his shoes as Colleen called after him, and pulled the articles of clothing on as he went for the stairs. He couldn't wait to explain the situation. If he was right then Matt was already in dire straits, wounded and exposed. Defenseless. He headed out past Midland. Past the city blocks surrounding it that were sealed off while cleanup took place.
He didn't know precisely where he was going, just followed the feeling like a beacon. He stopped when the sound of gravel and glass crunched underfoot. Heart hammering in his chest, he swallowed down his panic and doubt so he could reach out to that same feeling once more. Everything was frustratingly muddled! Focus.
[They had known one another briefly. Luke had his neighborhood, his sense of heart and connection there. Jessica had demons that needed to be reckoned with. Danny? Danny radiated light. That must have been why he was chosen by an ancient power. The goodness, the pureness of being which sounds like total bullshit except it's true. He was absolutely giving to the people at the restaurant, his name was on the building shamed. His very fist opened the door and the whole damn passage that connected Midland Circle to the desecrated grave of a dragon.
That's why he gripped to Danny. That was his request. It seemed like a small thing compared to what he was capable of.
Matt was just ready. There was no other way. Elektra would not be stopped. He would have to go down with her, or die trying. So that was to be the end. Though somehow as the brick, mortar, glass and everything else fell onto him breaking his body and falling through fire into filthy, muddy water. Everything was hurt and darkness. He wasn't awake enough to pray. And he certainly wasn't conscious enough to do much else than be taken by the currant and washed up on shore like the scattered garbage of the off shoot drain.
And he lay there. The warmth of sunlight wasn't enough to provide comfort, the suit melted to his skin and in some parts kept the swelling down if not sausaging him.
Help. God, please. Anyone. Help.
Matt knew he was alive because he could weep. Hell was about pain and punishment, though there as nothing and no one around him. Now and again he'd attempt to crawl further on the gravel. And as no surprise it was another discomfort. Exhaustion drove him to stillness and then finally un-restful sleep. Only for what felt like a few moments at a time. Should he even bother calling out for help again?]
H-help.
[His ribs were cracked if not broken. Breathing deeply made him aware of an unnatural shift. Matt fought down another sob. What use was it?]
[ After the events of Midland, and the revelations of the Hand and Chaste, Danny is uncertain of the light he radiates. He feels used, if he's being honest with himself. It's a thought he doesn't like to dwell on. He's not sure who he feels more used by. Maybe it's the fear of failing another as thoroughly as he failed the ancient city that drove him out to the shore of the Hudson river.
He doesn't want to think of the grave of the dragon and the intended use of something so sacred. It makes him sick.
Aching, crushing sadness envelopes him, but it doesn't feel as though it is his own. It's like a phantom pain, an echo, but it makes Danny draw his arms around himself protectively. The cold is something he doesn't feel like most, but the memory of it after the plane crash informs his motions. He closes his eyes again, reaching toward that feeling however hopeless it might be, and listens. ]
Matt!
[ He heard it. It was real and he heard it. His feet move before he realizes, and he's skidding over gravel and broken glass towards a sheet of white plastic billowing in the cold wind. He sees charred deep red and his heart leaps, but he stops himself from rolling him immediately. He can tell he's badly injured from a cursory glance. Moving him like this will only do more damage. He tries to soothe first. ]
[The missing business giant family was big, big news. Matt knew about it as a boy. Everyone knew about it. It was everywhere. And like that the Rand family was gone. A mystery and a Dateline special. Danny was a miracle in his own way. Not just the kung fu and the power...or whatever it was. He was brought back to New York for a purpose. Maybe this was to be some place new for him to hold dominion.
Dragons are bigger than devils.
Speaking again would be too much effort so he shuts his eyes, waiting to pass out again. Or to die. The ground vibrates. Footsteps? Vermin? A bird tried him what could have been a day or hours ago. Not dead, not yet. No meal here. The steps are too large, too weighted and steady. A person.
Moving hurts, and his eyes open and he makes a fist though he can't swing.]
...who's there-?
[He can't speak very loudly. God knows he can't hear and while it was a colossal hit he won't be struck into seeing.]
[ Danny's read the stories, and seen the videos. It's the only connection he has left with his parents outside of painful memories and an understandable fear of plane turbulence. He feels he has a purpose here, but now he feels adrift. Matt, though?
Matt is something solid to hold on to. He's alive, and that must mean something special. Something amazing.
He's no doctor, but he needs to be able to assess Matt better for what he's planning on doing. He can't move him like this. The wounded man simply won't be able to take it. He repeats himself a little louder when he notices blood coming from one ear. ]
Danny. It's Danny.
[ He apologizes profusely as he shifts to roll Matt onto his back. He cradles his head and the back of his neck. Gently lays him back as quickly and carefully as he's able. Now it's only a matter of focus. He's not sure how much this might take, and healing Colleen left him in a state. He knows more now than he did then. But he drags out his cell phone and sends a text in case with a rough location. ]
This is going to hurt, but I promise it'll be better after. Just hold on. [ He places his left hand on Matt's chest to keep him still, closes his eyes and his fist to focus his chi. ]
[Death is supposed to be permanent. Hell, there's no clear reason as to why Matt is alive. Not that he would call this much of living. Will he even remember it? The world is muffled, cold and he can sort of make out a name.
Manny? Randy?
Danny?
His thoughts sloush around slowly and when it registers he's moving is when he makes the most noise. A shocked cry and wincing. Mud and dirt have matted his hair. His face is a mess of microcuts, sludge and sediment there as well. Bouts of crying have cut the mess only to have more grime added.]
Please--I'm--no, no more.
[Of whatever is to come. No more. hurting. Though he has no idea what is going to happen next. It's like a shock wave passing through him and splintering into his skin, his bones, his blood. Then a slow, gathering warmth in the shards. He whimpers pathetically.]
[ It hurts him to see Matt in so much agony. He hopes that it will be more temporary after this. That he can ease at least a little of it, if not more. He was able to save Colleen from the clutches of death. If there is anything good to come of Bakuto at all, then let it be this.
It takes more focus to not stop at the soft cries of pain. He has to mentally block the pleas that fall from chapped, dirt-caked lips. He can't stop, not if this is going to work. I'm here. Hold on. He thinks as fiercely as he's able. Something brought them together again. Surely that same thing can relay a simple message. He has to believe it.
Danny focuses his chi, focuses on the parts of Matt that are broken and in agony. He senses the parts of him that are whole (few as they are), and uses them as a guide. There's no need to change those things, but he focuses on making whole the rest of him. Healing the broken parts and drawing away the pain. He groans, pain lancing through him, and squeezes his eyes shut more tightly. More time passes, and his hand starts to shake. ]
[He'll be grateful after. In this moment though it is just a fresh wash of hurts, awareness to some that went as a vague awareness or a distant throbbing. Now it's all coming up at once and met with those shards that feel like they're weaving into the cuts and tears. If he had enough strength in him he would grip at Danny, maybe push him off.
At some point his body feels like it is starting to hum as well as just...heat. Or is that what would have been a glow? Whatever it is, it's like the balled fist at his chest has forced something into him that can only be described as energy.
Chi?
Some Eastern ideology that Stick would use now and again. And also fling it in the face of Matt's Western education. He never knew it could do this. Or that it would feel like this. Breathing as hard as he is and as frequent he can feel the instant that ribs stop crackling and bending in ways they're not supposed to. It's amazing. It's terrifying.]
St-stop.
[Matt surprises himself by being able to make a feeble push at Danny. His mouth and nose are bleeding again and for the first time he smells not just blood but salt, rain and wet gravel. Oh God, he can smell! The blood in his ears crackles and he can make out the strained groans of Danny.]
[ As long as there is an after to be had. That's all Danny wants. He thought it was just his own grief refusing to be let go or quelled. Colleen might have thought the same, but he was never more glad to be proven wrong.
He's failed so much. Failed an entire city. Failed this haphazard team or family that they became out of necessity. He can't fail Matt. He won't. It's what's pushing and driving him now. Focus on what isn't right and fix it. Heal it. He can feel it working. Healing the broken man on the ground. ]
N--no. Not yet.
[ He can keep going. He needs to keep going. To make sure. Danny's whole frame is trembling, breath stuttering on the exhale, and he gives a bitten back noise of pain. The connection flickers sharply and stops, the glow of his fist subsiding in the morning light, and he slides away, dropping down to an elbow in the dirt heaps around them. His ears are ringing, and blood is rushing, making him dizzy.
He blinks to try and clear his vision, reaching out with trembling fingers to touch at Matt's face and assess the damage still there. Vision swimming as it is, he can't tell. Please let it be enough. He doesn't have anymore. ]
What--[His throat feels dry. And while his body has not felt like his own since the building fell, Matt has an inexplicable sense of stillness and peace. Maybe he's finally paralyzed. Though he wouldn't be able to shift his feet. The suit is uncomfortable as usual. Now it's wet and dirty. There's an ache rather than an all out hurt. Breath comes in and out of his lungs.]
Danny, what did you do?
[Was it something forbidden? The residual aftershocks--what else do you even call them? --of energy pulse, each time becoming lighter and lighter. Matt's brown eyes blink and his brow furrows in confusion.]
Danny!
[The way his heart is breathing and his breathing isn't reassuring. He grips at his wrist.]
[ His stomach is roiling, threatening to upheave anything it has in it. It wouldn't be much except tea and a meager meal the night before, he thinks. It doesn't matter. With his ears still ringing he can barely make out the sound of Matt shifting beside him. Moving of his own accord.
That's amazing. It had to have worked. He could cry. He might actually be, he can't tell. ]
I---[ Oh, it's a lot to even manage to talk. He focuses on his breath, shaky as it is, and lets his forehead drop to the dirt. He doesn't care. He feels so weak. ]---I healed you.
[Amazing is a word for it. Though holy God how is this possible? Matt keeps a clutch on his hand. He feels the impulse to try and move. Healing means he is restored. Though there's a strange feeling of wrongness to just move about as though nothing happened.
If he was not dying he was at the steps of Death itself. No mistake.]
[ Danny remembers that his family went to church on holidays. They weren't an every Sunday sort of family. They said prayers dutifully as any family might. Those times feel like so long ago. In that space of time he was taught other things. Shown other things that filled up those spaces.
He's learned what he can do. He knows it is a gift, but he can't think to say who it is from. Or what, outside of the dragon. That he knows. He can't help but give a raspy chuckle, voice muffled a moment as he gathers his wits a little. He turns his head to speak again, shifting the dirt and gravel under it. ]
No. I just---it took a lot out of me.
[ Is there an award for understatement of the year? ]
[Breathing and talking is not tiring. He can taste everything he's swallowed. Ash, dirty water, gravel, microscopic shards of glass though they're more texture. Did Danny take all of that into himself? How does it even work like that? The proof is felt, Matt can't quite brain what this is.
He swallows and shuts his eyes. Fingers thread with Danny's and give a squeeze.]
Thank you.
[For some reason an apology tries to drag it's way out from his lips as well. For worrying the man? For being such a broken person? For failing to die? This is something that should feel joyous.]
[ The fact that he's talking at all is nothing short of miraculous. Danny knows that much. He feels Matt's fingers curling into his own, and he offers a gentle squeeze back, shaky as it is. ]
It's the least I could do.
[ Is it selfish to be glad that he didn't fail at this as well? He's not sure his heart could have taken it. ]
I'll be ok.
[ It hurts more than he remembers with Colleen. Was it because there was so much that needed to be healed? He doesn't know. No one else is alive that would have those answers, either. Colleen is on her way, she'll find them. She'll get them out of there. He trusts in that. Trusts in her. ]
I just---I need---[ Another wave of dizziness washes through him, and he slumps next to Matt. It's too much. ]
[The chain of events in not even a whole half hour are miraculous. Matt didn't expect to be discovered, let alone discovered by someone he knew. And now after healed to such a degree that he never knew possible. Questions come to mind. While Danny is breathing as well as he can considering what manner of effort he exerted, he is out cold in the next moment.
Their fingers are still clasped together. Matt squeezes again. he doesn't expect a response. The world will know if Danny is or isn't around. The world doesn't let a billionaire disappear twice.]
It can wait.
[To himself, to Danny though he knows well there won't be a reply. Tires approach and gravel crunches. He tenses though finds there isn't a reason to. The voice he only half recognizes. A friend of Danny's. Oh God, what did you do this time? is her muttered response as she steps out and discovers not one, but two rumpled heroes.]
[ Danny's awareness fades completely. He's not aware of Colleen's arrival, or of the fact that she manages to wrestle two injured or unconscious men into her car. Danny never considered the fact that his wealth might keep him from disappearing again.
Then again it wasn't something he expected when he returned, really. He wanted to still be able to do good with it though. He tries.
When he comes around again, it's to familiar sensations and scents. Back at the apartment he shares with Colleen, in their bed, and for a moment he panics. He panics cause he thinks it might be some kind of nightmarish fever dream brought on by his grief. A way for his mind to heal it. ]
M--Matt?
[ He tries to physically shake off the residual lethargy of using so much chi. It's only enough that he is able to manage to get to his feet. Colleen is there, ready to coax him back towards the bed, more steady than he is by far. Assuring him the whole way that Matt is all right. He's in the other room.
That Danny needs to rest. He would argue that he didn't have a building fall on top of him. Well, sort of? ]
[Matt is awake enough to know that she is a friend. He tries his best to walk though he's not there or at least the healing hasn't rebound him into strength. Movement makes the energy hum. Has it always been like that and he's never been aware? At any rate slumping in the back seat with Danny makes him fall asleep. Colleen gets them back into the heart of the city.
Though it's their neighborhood, not Matt's. Though for the moment he would go anywhere. Set adrift on the stream of life like a leaf. For the first time he lets himself think of Elektra. Where did she go? Is she dead?
The half-waking state of being is what Colleen finds him in. She took Danny indoors first. Her friend and first priority. Matt would have done the same. He is placed in bed. Soothing words and incense burning. While inside she rolls out the futon to place over the tatami mats. There are also blankets for him. A pillow. Honestly he could sleep on anything. He doesn't remember getting in. Laying flat, even with the ruined suit on his body still he sleeps. Getting off his shoes is about the best that she can do on her own. The suit will need to be cut away. And not just with scissors but wire cutters it seems. The stirring in the next room with sound draws her attention away.
Colleen pets over Danny's shoulders. Gentle words. "Go back to sleep, when you wake up again we'll have dinner." And talk about what this all means if he's in enough health and spirits.]
[ Danny tries to insist that he's fine. He's well enough to be awake there now. To help. The incense helps lull him into a sense of calm. Her words help soothe his frazzled state of mind more. It's easier to give in to her gentle words.
He has enough presence of mind to know that while they are gentle, she is not one to be pushed when her mind is made, and it is. Running off in the middle of the day halfway through a meditation session after so much has happened has likely used up her patience for the moment. He doesn't always think before he acts.
He sighs and gives in to the soft touch and easy words. Huffing a sigh into the air, he lets himself fall back to sit at least on the mattress. Eyes shut briefly, and he lets his forehead fall forward to rest against her torso. ]
I heard him, Colleen. I don't know how.
[ Where do they find the answers now? As much as he hates the Hand, they did know more about the Iron Fist than he was ever taught. Why did his teachers in K'un-Lun keep so much from him? Was it more he was meant to learn as he stayed there as a protector? He'll never know that now. ]
[Danny Rand's version of fine is definitely not what most people would call fine by any stretch. He's Not steady on his feet. The way his eyes are darting around and the lack of composure are not at all what Colleen is used to. "Stay," she tells him, "rest a little bit longer." Which is absolutely not as threatening as she could be.
She doesn't have any answers, not right now. Colleen stays in the room with Danny until she is certain that he'll stay in one place. After a time she starts a curry. Simple, fast and hearty food. For Murdock, if he can eat at all, the rice should be fine or the curry sauce for some manner of sustenance. Matt's own deep sleep is filled with muddy, threatening dreams that make him pant and softly cry out. He twitches the way dogs do in the deepest of slumber.]
[ This is a far cry from his usual for certain. He's usually more collected, save when his emotions get the better of him. He's learning, slowly, to be more still. It takes time. She may not say it in such a threatening manner, but he knows her well enough to take it as such.
With a sigh he lays back, and lets himself drift again. It isn't long before he's asleep once more, a little more still than Murdock as rest finds him. When he wakes again, the lights are on, and that means that it must be after dark. He smells curry, and stretches before sitting up. He pads into the living room after finding a pair of old clothes to find Colleen and check on Matt. He wants to help.
He sits cross-legged on the floor near to the prone man, and sets the folded bundle next to his leg. ]
[Colleen is distracted in the kitchen. She would have tried to get Danny down for one more sleep. It's not meant to be. And truly if he has the finesse to sneak around under her nose, then that means he's on the right track.
The footsteps vibrate through the floor and mat. He stirs and groans, eyes opening again. This time it's a slow motion.]
[ He's not at his best, no. He'll get there with a little more rest. It won't be had in this moment, though. He doubts he'll get away without hearing something about it later when they're alone though.
Patiently, he waits for his friend to gather his wits a little. He looks over the ruined suit and contemplates how they'll go about getting it off of him. If they need a doctor, that's easy. There are plenty of talented ones employed by Rand. The only caveat is money enough to ensure silence as to Matt's identity. Without the suit they might be able to spin some kind of accident. ]
[There are times when it seems as though Danny is still a boy walking around with a man's body and face. Colleen cares for him deeply. She always will. Right now dealing with his latest whimsy, with Murdock here when he should have been--maybe even might have been--dead.
Matt's unseeing eyes move from the ceiling to where he can hear Danny. He can hear again. He can smell again. Still there's awful tinges of what his senses had gone through. Ash, cinder, dirt, water and blood all in bits. Breathing in clean air and smelling incense and now spices let him appreciate the recovered range.]
How do I feel?
[Even speaking softly he's incredulous, his voice breaking a little.]
[ There are very real reasons to explain that away. Things Danny doesn't like to think on, but that still plague his nightmares. Sometimes even intrude on his meditation. Lei Kung told him once to bury his parents. He never could. He was told that his compassion was a weakness. He refuses to believe that.
He watches as Matt seems to assess his surroundings. It's amazing the things that he can do. Even in a diminished capacity, he's astonishing. ]
But you aren't.
[ He reaches out when he hears the crack in the other man's voice, and gently places a hand on his shoulder. A small smile touches his lips. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
(for fightlikehell. ) a stone on the path means the teas not ready.
The first night, instead of giving in to meditation or grief, he'd taken to the streets. Most of the city seemed to know that it had lost something, but couldn't place exactly what. Any petty criminal foolish enough to be out and cross paths with Danny regretted the decision quickly. His temper got the better of him. Reckless and hot-headed as he usually is, it was amplified in his grief. Waking into the second day brought an acute awareness of loss to his senses, muddled and slowed his reflexes, and Colleen finally managed to coax him into a meditation session.
A brief amount of peace found him in the beginning of it. He tried to focus on the source of the turmoil in his mind. The pain of it, and to let it go. Something refused to budge, like a wall he couldn't push past. He felt cold like the bite of the weather outside of the apartment though he knew it was warm enough where he sat. The muffled sound of boats, and water. He could smell ash and taste blood.
He tried to dismiss the feelings. To push them out of his present focus, but they grew even stronger. It was a gasp in pain that suddenly had him jolting out of his meditation, and stumbling to his feet. He heard stories about the joining of consciousness, but he'd never actually done it before. If this was what he thought it was then---
Danny ran for the door, grabbing a jacket and his shoes as Colleen called after him, and pulled the articles of clothing on as he went for the stairs. He couldn't wait to explain the situation. If he was right then Matt was already in dire straits, wounded and exposed. Defenseless. He headed out past Midland. Past the city blocks surrounding it that were sealed off while cleanup took place.
He didn't know precisely where he was going, just followed the feeling like a beacon. He stopped when the sound of gravel and glass crunched underfoot. Heart hammering in his chest, he swallowed down his panic and doubt so he could reach out to that same feeling once more. Everything was frustratingly muddled! Focus.
He whispered but didn't expect a response. ]
Matt, where are you?
no subject
That's why he gripped to Danny. That was his request. It seemed like a small thing compared to what he was capable of.
Matt was just ready. There was no other way. Elektra would not be stopped. He would have to go down with her, or die trying. So that was to be the end. Though somehow as the brick, mortar, glass and everything else fell onto him breaking his body and falling through fire into filthy, muddy water. Everything was hurt and darkness. He wasn't awake enough to pray. And he certainly wasn't conscious enough to do much else than be taken by the currant and washed up on shore like the scattered garbage of the off shoot drain.
And he lay there. The warmth of sunlight wasn't enough to provide comfort, the suit melted to his skin and in some parts kept the swelling down if not sausaging him.
Help. God, please. Anyone. Help.
Matt knew he was alive because he could weep. Hell was about pain and punishment, though there as nothing and no one around him. Now and again he'd attempt to crawl further on the gravel. And as no surprise it was another discomfort. Exhaustion drove him to stillness and then finally un-restful sleep. Only for what felt like a few moments at a time. Should he even bother calling out for help again?]
H-help.
[His ribs were cracked if not broken. Breathing deeply made him aware of an unnatural shift. Matt fought down another sob. What use was it?]
no subject
He doesn't want to think of the grave of the dragon and the intended use of something so sacred. It makes him sick.
Aching, crushing sadness envelopes him, but it doesn't feel as though it is his own. It's like a phantom pain, an echo, but it makes Danny draw his arms around himself protectively. The cold is something he doesn't feel like most, but the memory of it after the plane crash informs his motions. He closes his eyes again, reaching toward that feeling however hopeless it might be, and listens. ]
Matt!
[ He heard it. It was real and he heard it. His feet move before he realizes, and he's skidding over gravel and broken glass towards a sheet of white plastic billowing in the cold wind. He sees charred deep red and his heart leaps, but he stops himself from rolling him immediately. He can tell he's badly injured from a cursory glance. Moving him like this will only do more damage. He tries to soothe first. ]
I'm here with you. It's Danny. Matt, I'm here.
no subject
Dragons are bigger than devils.
Speaking again would be too much effort so he shuts his eyes, waiting to pass out again. Or to die. The ground vibrates. Footsteps? Vermin? A bird tried him what could have been a day or hours ago. Not dead, not yet. No meal here. The steps are too large, too weighted and steady. A person.
Moving hurts, and his eyes open and he makes a fist though he can't swing.]
...who's there-?
[He can't speak very loudly. God knows he can't hear and while it was a colossal hit he won't be struck into seeing.]
no subject
Matt is something solid to hold on to. He's alive, and that must mean something special. Something amazing.
He's no doctor, but he needs to be able to assess Matt better for what he's planning on doing. He can't move him like this. The wounded man simply won't be able to take it. He repeats himself a little louder when he notices blood coming from one ear. ]
Danny. It's Danny.
[ He apologizes profusely as he shifts to roll Matt onto his back. He cradles his head and the back of his neck. Gently lays him back as quickly and carefully as he's able. Now it's only a matter of focus. He's not sure how much this might take, and healing Colleen left him in a state. He knows more now than he did then. But he drags out his cell phone and sends a text in case with a rough location. ]
This is going to hurt, but I promise it'll be better after. Just hold on. [ He places his left hand on Matt's chest to keep him still, closes his eyes and his fist to focus his chi. ]
no subject
Manny? Randy?
Danny?
His thoughts sloush around slowly and when it registers he's moving is when he makes the most noise. A shocked cry and wincing. Mud and dirt have matted his hair. His face is a mess of microcuts, sludge and sediment there as well. Bouts of crying have cut the mess only to have more grime added.]
Please--I'm--no, no more.
[Of whatever is to come. No more. hurting. Though he has no idea what is going to happen next. It's like a shock wave passing through him and splintering into his skin, his bones, his blood. Then a slow, gathering warmth in the shards. He whimpers pathetically.]
no subject
It takes more focus to not stop at the soft cries of pain. He has to mentally block the pleas that fall from chapped, dirt-caked lips. He can't stop, not if this is going to work. I'm here. Hold on. He thinks as fiercely as he's able. Something brought them together again. Surely that same thing can relay a simple message. He has to believe it.
Danny focuses his chi, focuses on the parts of Matt that are broken and in agony. He senses the parts of him that are whole (few as they are), and uses them as a guide. There's no need to change those things, but he focuses on making whole the rest of him. Healing the broken parts and drawing away the pain. He groans, pain lancing through him, and squeezes his eyes shut more tightly. More time passes, and his hand starts to shake. ]
no subject
At some point his body feels like it is starting to hum as well as just...heat. Or is that what would have been a glow? Whatever it is, it's like the balled fist at his chest has forced something into him that can only be described as energy.
Chi?
Some Eastern ideology that Stick would use now and again. And also fling it in the face of Matt's Western education. He never knew it could do this. Or that it would feel like this. Breathing as hard as he is and as frequent he can feel the instant that ribs stop crackling and bending in ways they're not supposed to. It's amazing. It's terrifying.]
St-stop.
[Matt surprises himself by being able to make a feeble push at Danny. His mouth and nose are bleeding again and for the first time he smells not just blood but salt, rain and wet gravel. Oh God, he can smell! The blood in his ears crackles and he can make out the strained groans of Danny.]
no subject
He's failed so much. Failed an entire city. Failed this haphazard team or family that they became out of necessity. He can't fail Matt. He won't. It's what's pushing and driving him now. Focus on what isn't right and fix it. Heal it. He can feel it working. Healing the broken man on the ground. ]
N--no. Not yet.
[ He can keep going. He needs to keep going. To make sure. Danny's whole frame is trembling, breath stuttering on the exhale, and he gives a bitten back noise of pain. The connection flickers sharply and stops, the glow of his fist subsiding in the morning light, and he slides away, dropping down to an elbow in the dirt heaps around them. His ears are ringing, and blood is rushing, making him dizzy.
He blinks to try and clear his vision, reaching out with trembling fingers to touch at Matt's face and assess the damage still there. Vision swimming as it is, he can't tell. Please let it be enough. He doesn't have anymore. ]
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Danny, what did you do?
[Was it something forbidden? The residual aftershocks--what else do you even call them? --of energy pulse, each time becoming lighter and lighter. Matt's brown eyes blink and his brow furrows in confusion.]
Danny!
[The way his heart is breathing and his breathing isn't reassuring. He grips at his wrist.]
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That's amazing. It had to have worked. He could cry. He might actually be, he can't tell. ]
I---[ Oh, it's a lot to even manage to talk. He focuses on his breath, shaky as it is, and lets his forehead drop to the dirt. He doesn't care. He feels so weak. ]---I healed you.
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If he was not dying he was at the steps of Death itself. No mistake.]
You're not going to go instead are you?
[That's an important ask here!]
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He's learned what he can do. He knows it is a gift, but he can't think to say who it is from. Or what, outside of the dragon. That he knows. He can't help but give a raspy chuckle, voice muffled a moment as he gathers his wits a little. He turns his head to speak again, shifting the dirt and gravel under it. ]
No. I just---it took a lot out of me.
[ Is there an award for understatement of the year? ]
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He swallows and shuts his eyes. Fingers thread with Danny's and give a squeeze.]
Thank you.
[For some reason an apology tries to drag it's way out from his lips as well. For worrying the man? For being such a broken person? For failing to die? This is something that should feel joyous.]
...it hurt you too.
[Or at least that's what it sounds like.]
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It's the least I could do.
[ Is it selfish to be glad that he didn't fail at this as well? He's not sure his heart could have taken it. ]
I'll be ok.
[ It hurts more than he remembers with Colleen. Was it because there was so much that needed to be healed? He doesn't know. No one else is alive that would have those answers, either. Colleen is on her way, she'll find them. She'll get them out of there. He trusts in that. Trusts in her. ]
I just---I need---[ Another wave of dizziness washes through him, and he slumps next to Matt. It's too much. ]
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Their fingers are still clasped together. Matt squeezes again. he doesn't expect a response. The world will know if Danny is or isn't around. The world doesn't let a billionaire disappear twice.]
It can wait.
[To himself, to Danny though he knows well there won't be a reply. Tires approach and gravel crunches. He tenses though finds there isn't a reason to. The voice he only half recognizes. A friend of Danny's. Oh God, what did you do this time? is her muttered response as she steps out and discovers not one, but two rumpled heroes.]
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Then again it wasn't something he expected when he returned, really. He wanted to still be able to do good with it though. He tries.
When he comes around again, it's to familiar sensations and scents. Back at the apartment he shares with Colleen, in their bed, and for a moment he panics. He panics cause he thinks it might be some kind of nightmarish fever dream brought on by his grief. A way for his mind to heal it. ]
M--Matt?
[ He tries to physically shake off the residual lethargy of using so much chi. It's only enough that he is able to manage to get to his feet. Colleen is there, ready to coax him back towards the bed, more steady than he is by far. Assuring him the whole way that Matt is all right. He's in the other room.
That Danny needs to rest. He would argue that he didn't have a building fall on top of him. Well, sort of? ]
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Though it's their neighborhood, not Matt's. Though for the moment he would go anywhere. Set adrift on the stream of life like a leaf. For the first time he lets himself think of Elektra. Where did she go? Is she dead?
The half-waking state of being is what Colleen finds him in. She took Danny indoors first. Her friend and first priority. Matt would have done the same. He is placed in bed. Soothing words and incense burning. While inside she rolls out the futon to place over the tatami mats. There are also blankets for him. A pillow. Honestly he could sleep on anything. He doesn't remember getting in. Laying flat, even with the ruined suit on his body still he sleeps. Getting off his shoes is about the best that she can do on her own. The suit will need to be cut away. And not just with scissors but wire cutters it seems. The stirring in the next room with sound draws her attention away.
Colleen pets over Danny's shoulders. Gentle words. "Go back to sleep, when you wake up again we'll have dinner." And talk about what this all means if he's in enough health and spirits.]
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He has enough presence of mind to know that while they are gentle, she is not one to be pushed when her mind is made, and it is. Running off in the middle of the day halfway through a meditation session after so much has happened has likely used up her patience for the moment. He doesn't always think before he acts.
He sighs and gives in to the soft touch and easy words. Huffing a sigh into the air, he lets himself fall back to sit at least on the mattress. Eyes shut briefly, and he lets his forehead fall forward to rest against her torso. ]
I heard him, Colleen. I don't know how.
[ Where do they find the answers now? As much as he hates the Hand, they did know more about the Iron Fist than he was ever taught. Why did his teachers in K'un-Lun keep so much from him? Was it more he was meant to learn as he stayed there as a protector? He'll never know that now. ]
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She doesn't have any answers, not right now. Colleen stays in the room with Danny until she is certain that he'll stay in one place. After a time she starts a curry. Simple, fast and hearty food. For Murdock, if he can eat at all, the rice should be fine or the curry sauce for some manner of sustenance. Matt's own deep sleep is filled with muddy, threatening dreams that make him pant and softly cry out. He twitches the way dogs do in the deepest of slumber.]
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With a sigh he lays back, and lets himself drift again. It isn't long before he's asleep once more, a little more still than Murdock as rest finds him. When he wakes again, the lights are on, and that means that it must be after dark. He smells curry, and stretches before sitting up. He pads into the living room after finding a pair of old clothes to find Colleen and check on Matt. He wants to help.
He sits cross-legged on the floor near to the prone man, and sets the folded bundle next to his leg. ]
Matt, can you hear me?
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The footsteps vibrate through the floor and mat. He stirs and groans, eyes opening again. This time it's a slow motion.]
...Danny--? Then it wasn't a dream.
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Patiently, he waits for his friend to gather his wits a little. He looks over the ruined suit and contemplates how they'll go about getting it off of him. If they need a doctor, that's easy. There are plenty of talented ones employed by Rand. The only caveat is money enough to ensure silence as to Matt's identity. Without the suit they might be able to spin some kind of accident. ]
No, it wasn't. How do you feel?
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Matt's unseeing eyes move from the ceiling to where he can hear Danny. He can hear again. He can smell again. Still there's awful tinges of what his senses had gone through. Ash, cinder, dirt, water and blood all in bits. Breathing in clean air and smelling incense and now spices let him appreciate the recovered range.]
How do I feel?
[Even speaking softly he's incredulous, his voice breaking a little.]
...I should be dead.
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He watches as Matt seems to assess his surroundings. It's amazing the things that he can do. Even in a diminished capacity, he's astonishing. ]
But you aren't.
[ He reaches out when he hears the crack in the other man's voice, and gently places a hand on his shoulder. A small smile touches his lips. ]
You're here.
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